De-stress by being kind to self

Having aspirations helps us navigate life in a meaningful and fulfilling way, but it can also cause psychological distress when hopes are left unfulfilled.

Edith Cowan University (ECU) research has found that it's not failing to make progress toward our 'ideal-self' that is problematic but rather the tendency to focus on that lack of progress in a negative way that leads to psychological distress.The 'ideal-self' and 'actual-self' discrepancies were associated with depressive and anxious symptoms.'Rumination', or excessive negative thinking overlack of progress in relation to our 'ought self' (ie. duties, responsibilities, obligations) directly increased anxiety (but not depression).

Reflecting on and at times modifying our self-guides may be helpful,but being caught in a spiral of negative self-evaluation that is accompanied by a constant sense of failing to meet overly high standards is not.We need to be kind to ourselves and keep our self-guides in perspective, according to the researchers.